The Shadow of an Addict: A Collection of Poetry

On the road to redemption
The path to paradise
Held by the beast of addiction
Along with the struggles of life
I came from a broken home
A divorced marriage
Even though there was times I was alone
I still have both my parents
Inflicting my own problems
Choosing to take drugs
In hopes I figured a way to solve them
By excepting the devils love
At twenty-six years old
I haven't used dope in five years
It's a long time but I know
At any moment the disease can reappear
An opiate addict that started with OC's
Progressively heading towards brown powder
I ended up shooting that fluid in me
Taking me to my darkest hour
I was on the brink of a drug induced suicide
When the miracle moment of clarity happened
Standing at L street beach I finally realized
It was a stranger I was now trapped in
In Arlington from the days of my youth
Through my teens in the projects in Somerville
Living under my boy's mother's Southie roof
Hoping to die with every needle I filled
I was facing a distribution trial
And there was only three options left
Death, rot in prison for while,
Or leave my pride behind on a halfway houses door step
I chose the third
I had to give myself a chance
Heroin was all I had in the world
But it was time I made my last stand
A program on Mount Ida in Dorchester
Saved my life
Everything started to get better
The further I moved away from the spike
It's not easy staying clean
But the struggle slowly fades away
I still remember how bad it was as a fiend
When I had to get high just to make it through the day

Looking back at how far I've come
Is an accomplishment in itself
But the blame for where these problems came from
Can only be pointed at myself
Today I'm a single father
To Christian James, my shining son
Maybe my life had to be harder
In order for him to have an easier one
These poems are what I've experienced
I write as a way to cope
Now when my backs against the fence
I don't have to turn to dope
Expressions of my pain
Lessons I learned the hard way
I hope I can help make a change
By having someone listen to what I have to say